The cool people
PT-LawMom has this really funky way of reading my mind. Last month it was feminism, right when I was writing about it (even if I wasn't posting). This month it's girk-dom.
I've been thinking a lot about being the girk on blogs written and commented upon by "the cool people." You know - published authors. They all seem to have this knack for socializing that I don't have... so when I leave a comment, I'm all, "Oh crap. What a stupid thing to say. Can I delete it? Should I delete it? I'll look hypersensitive if I delete it. But now I just look dumb. Crap. I'm going to stop commenting altogether and hope they all forget about me...." And yet I continue to comment on the cool people's blogs.
I know at least part of it is the agent hunt, which is messing with my head, even though I have more than enough to keep me occupied while I wait. But I'm sure that even if I get signed, I'll continue to feel like a poser... which I'm assured that most published writers do, even among each other. Is it possible?
Meanwhile (I can't believe I forgot to tack this on in the first draft I posted!) J.T. Ellison blogs about social networking at Murderati, with the most salient point of all in comments: "I still believe that spending your time making your work the best it can be will always trump interaction." It's a great point, and if I can remember that, I might just come up with some semi-cool comment!
I've been thinking a lot about being the girk on blogs written and commented upon by "the cool people." You know - published authors. They all seem to have this knack for socializing that I don't have... so when I leave a comment, I'm all, "Oh crap. What a stupid thing to say. Can I delete it? Should I delete it? I'll look hypersensitive if I delete it. But now I just look dumb. Crap. I'm going to stop commenting altogether and hope they all forget about me...." And yet I continue to comment on the cool people's blogs.
I know at least part of it is the agent hunt, which is messing with my head, even though I have more than enough to keep me occupied while I wait. But I'm sure that even if I get signed, I'll continue to feel like a poser... which I'm assured that most published writers do, even among each other. Is it possible?
Meanwhile (I can't believe I forgot to tack this on in the first draft I posted!) J.T. Ellison blogs about social networking at Murderati, with the most salient point of all in comments: "I still believe that spending your time making your work the best it can be will always trump interaction." It's a great point, and if I can remember that, I might just come up with some semi-cool comment!
posted by Christa M. Miller at 9:20 PM
7 Comments:
This post makes me feel a little better about feeling like a ginormous dork every time I comment on someone's blog (this time included). I have this odd default position that, whether I'm agented or not, published or not, there's always this inner circle of folks who've got the social bits of being a writer down pat, and they're looking around thinking, "Great -- who invited THAT guy?" It's a tough mind-set to avoid, particularly for folks as obsessive with what they put out into the world as writers.
That's cause we're too much alike for our own good. ;)
I think the only thing we can do is try to believe that our contributions are important and hope no one calls us on it! I do much, much, MUCH better online than in person. Although I have stopped participating in some online groups where I feel like I was not wanted (iVillage, for example, was really bad when I was pregnant!). And I noticed that some of my readers stopped posting when I admitted the reason behind my recent illness (i.e., the surgery). People don't like the fat kid and that never changes. Heck, I even feel awkward around you sometimes!!!
Just remember that even the cool people have cool people and, when it comes down to it, everyone's a dork. Some are just better at hiding it than others.
Chris - the "inner circle" is the perfect way to describe it. Like right now I'll see a group of authors who work with a particular agent (there are a few of these) and think they're definitely the inner circle. Also those who go to all the conventions and drink together!
PT, I do better online too, but I guess I'm more sensitive to this particular issue because I'm still trying to "break in" to the published-author universe. Do you feel that way as a law student commenting on lawyer blogs?
Stephen, it's the people who are good at hiding their inner dorks that intimidate me. I have never been able to hide a damn thing. (Losing things I'm great at, but not hiding them. You know, accidentally vs. on purpose.)
I guess I should be glad that no one told me to picture the cool people naked. That has always seemed just wrong to me. Especially on the Internet!
I certainly don't consider myself one of the "cool" people because I'm published. Frankly, I'm not sure what makes one person any "cooler" than another. Certainly in my mind, obtaining published status is not the trigger.
The "cool" people I know are those that are kind and thoughtful who actually care about people, their families and their writing. That to me, is very "cool." I'm glad to know a bunch of them : )
Felicia Donovan
THE BLACK WIDOW AGENCY
www.feliciadonovan.com
Ms. Donovan's comment reminded me that I wanted to order her book. I've ordered it through her web site. Can't wait to read it (and pass it on to my Mom).
P.S. Did you see that Julia Spencer-Fleming's next book will be out in early 2008? I can't wait!!!!!
Felicia, I usually feel on Sarah's or some author sites like people are thinking, "Oh god, there's that weird chick again. Got a couple of short stories published and now she thinks she's one of us. If we ignore her, maybe she'll go away...." LOL
LawMom, I did see that! I can't wait either!
Post a Comment
<< Home